Shameless request before today’s post: (If you get a chance, please go HERE and take my quick 4 question survey. THANKS!!! Now back to the business at hand…)
Today was one of those hazy, hot, humid days that I so love… NOT!!! Okay, it’s June 1st and the weather should be warming up, but it already feels like August out there, and I am dreading what August will bring if this is just a taste.
I did get a lot accomplished today, washed my car, paid some bills, ran some errands and then went inside took a shower and then sat in front of the air conditioner. It’s one of those days where you want to strip off all your clothes, just to cool off indoors. (I know don’t scream, I hope I haven’t made you lose your lunch!) Anyway, I can’t stand the sight of my own body and I wouldn’t dream of being the cause of your blindness either.
Anyway, through it all today, I have also had a lot of time to think. Sometimes I put off thinking because I don’t want to face those inner demons that seem to surface when all seems quiet and well. However, today I’ve thought of how far I have come in my journey and how far I have left. Although I still have many issues that need to be settled, I’ve decided to set myself a limit as to when I finally come out. Some of my issues are minor and easy to fix, while others are major but hopefully they all will be worked out as much as possible for my coming out party. And yes, I want to have a party when I do finally come out. My feeling is that for me it will be a re-birth of sorts and a way to say goodbye to the old life of secrets and lies and hello to a renewed life of new beginnings, honesty and pride in who and what I am. What better way to start a that life than with a party with all those you love close by? (I just hope that most if not all still love me AFTER, but at that point that will be their problem and not mine!)
So, I’ve decided to make my 50th birthday as my “Independence Day” . In the meantime, I know that those of you who wish will be here to read as I vent, rant and rave as I work through this process. Hopefully I won’t loose too many of you along the way and maybe even gain a few more online friends! I thank you for being there for me as well as any comments you may have along the way to aid me through my journey.